Jan 11, 2011

Normally, I would charge it to the game and abstain from discussing such frivolous matters, but this issue needs to be addressed before things spiral out of control. There has already been an unprecedented number of casualties.

The Male Groupie.

I didn’t want to believe it at first, but you do indeed exist.

You shameless, dirty niggas you.

But besides the fact that you exist, my penultimate concern is that you aren’t even hip to your own presence. I cannot fault you for lack of awareness due to the long-standing misconception that females are the only ones capable of sporting the title of “The Groupie”. Albeit, something has to change cause some of you dudes have got women beat!

One may argue that male groupies are simply a myth because...
(Hit the link for the rest..)
...they don’t have anyone to stan for.
Female actresses? Maybe.
Female musicians? Possibly.
Female athletes? Unlikely.
But therein lies the greater problem. Male Groupies aren't just stanning for females. Male Groupies are out here going hard for other males, as well.

That’s right. They wake up every morning, “rise and grind” for Fabolous, “wake and bake” for Wiz Khalifa and go on their merry ways. They disguise themselves as fans, but we all know the truth. The most pervasive example being the grown men are out here repping Taylor Gang and The Jets vehemently. Once they caught wind that Wiz only smoked papers, these guys put their blunts down and joined the movement...bragging about rolling papers and filters as though the concept was invented with the release of Kush and Orange Juice. If Wiz said he was a vegetarian tomorrow, KFC and Church's Chicken chains across the country would go out of business as a result of his Male Groupies alone. This is just one example, for we all know that Kid Cudi and many other celebs have Male Groupies, too.

Long gone are the days of appreciating celebrities from a distance. Male Groupies have ushered in a new era of appreciating these celebrities right from the tip of their sacks. And I am here to say that it is not OK. Especially considering how quickly men are to call women groupies. Stop it. In the words of the homie Alexis over at Looking4Trouble:

“Is something troubling you? Let it be known.”


@RonaldRanier said...

This sudden movement of labeling your fans and starting groups has been around for a while now. My cousin often refers to herself as one of Mariah Carey's "Lambs." (I know,embarrassing.)
Claiming these groups [Taylor Gang, Jets, Bricksquad, & SODMG (I ran out)] doesn't disturb me as much when they worship the "leaders." How in the hell do you look up to someone who said "bitch better speak cuz she know I play Nintendo" - Lil' B.
But you know what, as long as they aren't worshipping people like Tookie Williams & Larry Hoover, I can look over it.

Dub said...

LOL, I feel you. I'm just being facetious really. hint of seriousness. but I agree about Lil B. His fans tell him, "you can f my chick" that's the quintessential male groupie.

Don't watch me, w-w-watch my feet....